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UNDERSTANDING SPANIARDS

12 sure-fire ways to offend a Spaniard

From ordering the wrong drinks with tapas to calling one of their official languages a dialect, these are just two of the ways you may inadvertently offend a Spaniard.

12 sure-fire ways to offend a Spaniard
Here are 12 sure-fire ways to offend a Spaniard, which to be clear is not something we want you to do. Photo: JORGE GUERRERO / AFP

Readers’ responses 

Not making an effort to speak the language 

Many readers commented on the fact that Spaniards will often get offended if you “don’t even try and make an effort to speak Spanish” or another local language like Catalan, and just simply expect that everyone will be able to speak English. While we all know that learning another language can be challenging for some, if you’re living in Spain it’s important that you try and locals will really appreciate your efforts if you do. 

Ordering the wrong drinks with tapas

There are certain drinks that go with tapas in Spain, this could be wine, beer, soft drinks. But never coffee or spirits, some of The Local’s readership pointed out. As one reader put it, “don’t order a café con leche with your ensaladilla rusa“. 

Disrespecting Spanishness

In general, Spaniards don’t get offended very easily and will often even make fun of themselves, but when it’s a foreigner having a go at Spanish people or their culture then it’s a whole different matter. One Italian reader married to a Spaniard said that this patriotic reaction can happen “even if you point out something they complain about every day of their life while among friends”.

“Referring to Mexicans as Spanish, not Spanish-speaking”, “telling Spanish people they don’t look Spanish”, calling them “the Spanish rather than Spaniards” are some of the other observations readers contributed.

It’s also best to stay clear of Spanish stereotypes such saying that Spaniards are lazy, they all have siestas, dance flamenco and have a lisp, for starters because these clichés are far removed from the truth. 

Comparing Spain to other countries

‘Spain is different’ or so the famous slogan goes, so there’s no point comparing it to your home country. As one reader put “incessantly comparing Spain to the UK and complaining that Spain doesn’t measure up or expecting all laws in Spain to be the same as the UK,” is sure to offend some people.

The fact that a number of foreign readers suggested that a way to offend Spaniards would be to “use indicators and roundabouts correctly” highlights how some people have a tendency to compare Spain to their home country in a critical manner.

Un-Spanish table manners

Spaniards are proud of their cuisine, so they understandably like eating to be done according to their set of rules. Condiments for example are not really a thing – unless you’re at a burger bar. As one Spanish reader put it, “I’d say we’re not easily offended in general. Maybe putting ketchup anywhere else than on your fries,” then adding other foodie faux pas such as “eating sandwich bread instead of real bread with your meals” and “the absence of olive oil”.

Readers also added that “you shouldn’t ask for salt and pepper with your food or vinegar for your chips”, that you’ll get weird looks if “you eat while you walk”.

Complaining about how Spaniards perceive time

Ernest Hemingway famously said “There is no night life in Spain. They stay up late but they get up late. That is not night life. That is delaying the day”.

And anyone who’s lived in Spain knows that the clocks run differently for Spaniards, from the times people eat, to the time they arrive somewhere and even the way they refer to the time.

“Organising to go out for dinner too early”, “disturbing people during siesta time”, “referring to 6pm as the evening instead of the afternoon” or “having a go at someone for being late” are all ways that readers have suggested can rub Spaniards up the wrong way. 

Cured meat crimes

Spaniards love their cold meats, from all the jamones to the chorizos, fuet, cecina, lomos, the list is endless. So attempting to “fry a slice of Jamón de Jabugo” or “referring to chorizo as pepperoni” would also be considered crimes against ‘h(a)manity’ and offend the locals, according to our readers. 

Remember when British celebrity chef Jamie Oliver tweeted a recipe for paella that included chorizo? Spaniards were so appalled at his suggestion that he suffered a lot of backlash on social media and the Guardian newspaper even wrote “Jamie Oliver’s paella brings fractured Spain together … against him“.

Oh, and telling them that jamón is bad for their health is unlikely to go down well. Spaniards just don’t want to hear it. Back in 2015, there was an uproar when the World Health Organisation warned that carcinogens were present in certain types of meat, including jamón. Then in 2021, Spanish Consumer Affairs Minister Alberto Garzón caused much anger across the country when he urged Spaniards to eat less red meat like jamón to protect their health, as well as the future of the planet.

The Local’s suggestions

Mislabelling languages and dialects

Here’s a divisive topic among Spaniards, so it’s best avoided. Spain in fact has five official languages: Spanish, Catalan, Galician, Basque and Aranese, and yes there are indeed actual languages and not dialects. So suggesting to a Catalan that their language is merely a dialect of Spanish is a sure-fire way to get an earful and cause a lot of upset.

It’s also best to not talk about Valencian and Mallorquín. Valencian may be a dialect of Catalan but never refer to the language as Catalan, always Valenciano, especially if talking to proud Valencians. The same goes for other dialects of Catalan such as Mallorquín, which is spoken on the Balearic Island of Mallorca.

READ ALSO: Seven things you should never say to a Catalan person

Bringing up Franco or the Civil War

It’s fair to say that the wounds left behind by Franco’s 36-year dictatorship and the bloody Civil War that preceded it haven’t healed yet, with even new laws being brought out to this day to deal with this troubled past. People on both sides lost family members, some families supported Franco’s regime and others abhorred it (even to this day), so with such a prickly subject it’s best to stay clear from the topic as there’s a high chance you could bring up uncomfortable memories and put your foot in it. 

Cheering for the wrong football team

Spaniards take football very seriously. It’s not just young men who are football fans here, no, you’ll find everyone from grandmas to little kids get swept up in the football fever. Be careful when you’re travelling around Spain though that you’re not out in a bar cheering for the other team. You’ll definitely be given dirty looks and some stern words if you’re cheering for Real Madrid in a bar in Barcelona for example. Or even rooting for Barça in an Espanyol bar (Barcelona’s other football team), or Real in an Atleti bar in Madrid.

READ ALSO – The good, the bad and the ugly: What are the regional stereotypes across Spain? 

Failing to be impressed by their mother’s/grandmother’s cooking

Ask any Spaniard where they ate the best croquetas, tortilla de patatas or paella and most likely they’ll say at their mama or abuela makes Spain’s best. Implying that someone’s mum’s food isn’t as good as what you had at the local tapas bar last week, is definitely not going to win you any friends. In fact, avoid mentioning anything remotely critical about their mothers or other family members, full stop.

Talking about independence movements or politics 

One quick way to make an enemy is Spain is to bring up independence movements, especially in Catalonia or in the Basque Country. Don’t presume to know all about the situation and never reveal what side you’re on before you know how the person you’re talking to feels about it. It is a topic that has divided regions and cities for many years. And it’s also best to avoid talking about Gibraltar. 

READ ALSO: 13 mistakes tourists in Spain are bound to make

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For members

UNDERSTANDING SPANIARDS

The ‘strange’ things Spanish parents do raising their children

Spain is a fantastic country to bring up kids thanks to the weather, the safety and Spaniards' overall love of children, but that doesn't mean there aren't aspects of Spanish child-rearing that surprise foreigners.

The 'strange' things Spanish parents do raising their children

One of the most obvious cultural clashes experienced when you move to a new country is just how differently parents go about bringing up their children.

We become so used to the traditions we ourselves were brought up in that other people’s parenting techniques can appear exotic, baffling and sometimes just downright bizarre.

So despite the fact that Spain is a very family-oriented country where babies and children are adored by relatives and even strangers, there are still culture shocks relating to Spanish parenting that foreigners who move here don’t quite understand.

READ ALSO: Young Spaniards most emotionally attached to parents in EU

Spanish baby girls all have their ears pierced

When I was a girl I had the tortuous wait until I reached the grand old age of twelve before my parents allowed me to pierce my ears. In Spain baby girls are adorned with ear studs before they even leave the hospital.

Those parents who choose not to violate the velvety soft lobes of their new-born daughters will be forever having to correct people on the true gender of their baby. Dressing head to toe pink just won’t be enough.

READ MORE: Why do Spanish parents pierce their babies’ ears?

There is no set bedtime for a lot of Spanish children

While northern European parents may be preoccupied with establishing a routine of bath, book and bed by 7pm so that they can enjoy some adult time or even call in a babysitter and enjoy a rare night now, such habits are not prevalent in Spanish society.

Children stay awake late into the night, joining their parents in restaurants long past 10pm and tearing round terrazas with other youngsters on warm summer nights while their parents enjoy a drink or dinner with their friends. It is not unusual to find young children curled up in a chair fast asleep in a noisy bar or restaurant.

READ ALSO: Why I’ll never adopt Spanish bedtimes for my children 

Spanish kids often don’t get enough sleep. Photo: Vidal Balielo Jr./Pexels

Many Spanish children know how to swear like a trooper

Don’t be shocked to hear a Spanish child reel off a string of expletives or casually intersperse dialogue with “joder, mamá!”

While the equivalent might have earned an English child the threat of “washing your mouth out with soap and water” in Spain it is just a reflection of how prevalent swearing is in everyday language and is not a sign of being badly brought up. And the upside is adults don’t have to modify the way the speak in front of the kids.

READ ALSO: Oysters, not hostias! How to ‘swear’ politely in Spanish

Spanish children can get away with some swearing, but their parents may allow some cussing without a telling off. Photo: Mohamed Abdelghaffar/Pexels

Children actually wear ‘Sunday best’ and not just on Sundays

The Spanish take ‘Sunday Best’ to a whole new level, decking their children out for lunch in a restaurant or a walk in the park in corduroy knickerbockers, sailor suits and pinafores in outfits that wouldn’t have looked out of place in Edwardian times. Siblings are often decked out in matching ensembles.

The tendency to overdress means that in winter, children will be wrapped up as if for a day on the ski-slopes even if it is 10C outside and even in the height of summer it’s a rare sight to see a Spanish child running around barefoot in the sand or on the grass.

It doesn’t have to be a special occasion for some parents to dress their children in posh and pricy clothing. Photo: Cristina Quicler/AFP

Spanish children are allowed to play with fireworks

It seems to me that one of the greatest thrills of being a kid in Spain is setting off firecrackers in a town square to make unsuspecting guiris like me jump out of my skin. While in the UK, the dangerous job of setting up the fireworks for the annual Guy Fawkes night firework display fell to a man in protective clothing located far away behind a fence.

In Spain the laissez faire attitude to pyrotechnics means it’s not unusual to see a rocket whizzing through the crowds at a summer festival.

It’s not uncommon to see children let off firecrackers and play with pyrotechnics despite the dangers. (Photo by Guillermo Arias / AFP)

Long summer holidays and extended stays with the grandparents

With the school summer holidays stretching well beyond two months and the predominant situation of two working parents, Spanish children are frequently farmed off to the ‘pueblo’ to be looked after by the grandparents for at least a fortnight over the summer. Many spend several weeks at a summer camp at the start of the holidays before heading out of the cities and if they are lucky, to the seaside, to be spoilt by their grandparents. With great summer weather and free childcare and a chance for the older generation to spend quality time with the youngest it’s a win-win situation for the whole family.

READ ALSO: Why Spain’s ‘super-grandparents’ want to be paid to babysit

Many Spanish grandparents are ‘expected’ to take care of their grandkids on a regular basis. (Photo by DESIREE MARTIN / AFP)

Babies wear perfume

For some baffling reason Spain is obsessed with baby perfume. An American friend living in Madrid who had a baby shower ahead of the birth of her first baby was quite startled to receive not one, not two, but three different brands of bottled baby perfume with which to douse her new-born.  

Because what mother wouldn’t want to disguise that sweet freshly bathed new-born baby smell, right? 

Nenuco is the number one baby cologne brand in Spain; it’s been a tradition to use it on babies for years. Photo: Nenuco

This article was originally written by Fiona Govan in 2019. 

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