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DANISH HABITS

The things you won’t see in Denmark that are common elsewhere

It’s easy to notice things like bicycles, candles and mixed weather when you move to or visit Denmark. But which everyday items are conspicuous by their absence?

Published: 15 August 2024 15:05 CEST
The things you won't see in Denmark that are common elsewhere
Curtains in Denmark? Not likely. Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash

Moving to Denmark – or just visiting it as a tourist – offers no shortage of sights and customs that you won’t have met with anywhere else.

At the same time, several elements of European life are conspicuously absent from life in Denmark, causing you after a while to suddenly realise they’re missing.

White bread

Okay, white bread is obviously not completely absent in Denmark. You can get it in supermarkets and you might occasionally see it offered at a cafe or in someone’s cupboard. The latter two situations are extraordinarily rare, however.

This is because of the near-total dominance of rye bread (rugbrød) as the staple of Danes’ bready needs. Most packed lunches consist of a rugbrødsmad: a “rye bread meal” consisting of a single slice of rye bread, usually buttered, with a simple topping or pålæg.

If you’re eating lunch at a more upscale restaurant or cafe, you might enjoy a smørrebrød, which is essentially the same thing but with fancier toppings (don’t tell any Danes I said this).

The preference for rye bread is deep-rooted in Danish culture and is understandable from a nutritional standpoint but the dark, heavy slices can take some getting used to for the newcomer.

When you do see white bread, it is most likely to be in the form of boller or bread rolls, or franskbrød, fresh baked loaves or baguettes.

Sliced white bread (think Hovis if you’re from the UK) is very low on the list of preferences to the point of being looked down on, and is only really used to make toasties.

READ ALSO: 

Cash

The near-complete absence of cash in everyday transactions in Denmark goes beyond what seems like normal modern trends towards cashless payments.

It’s not uncommon for Danish residents to see entire months pass without a single physical coin or banknote changing hands.

Instead, most people use electronic payment methods such as the dominant MobilePay app, mobile payments like Apple or Google pay, and contactless cards. 

These effectively render cash obsolete in most scenarios:

Ordering takeaway? Use MobilePay.

Going shopping? Pay via card.

Paying the mortgage? Online banking.

Donating at church? MobilePay again.

Last year, only one in five people in Denmark said they’d find it difficult to get by if cash didn’t exist, demonstrating Denmark’s preference for doing business electronically.

Littering

Bustling tourist hubs such as Copenhagen’s Nyhavn in the peak season, and giant music festivals like Roskilde are the exceptions but, generally speaking, Denmark’s streets tend to be very clean compared to some other European countries.

With a deeply ingrained culture of personal responsibility for waste management, many Danes tend to maintain their urban environments to a very high standard, making ugly piles of trash a rare sight.

The widespread adage is to leave every place cleaner than how you found it. Therefore, don’t be surprised if you see people picking up others’ litter in the woods, on hikes, or on walks through their neighbourhoods.

It’s also common for residential areas to have small recycling deposits where people can leave unwanted large items like white goods, pieces of furniture or cardboard and wood without taking a longer journey to a municipal recycling centre. This further encourages waste sorting, discourages fly tipping and makes people less inclined to break with conformity by not depositing waste responsibly.

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Whatsapp

Once again, we’re not being literal here: Whatsapp is available in Denmark and plenty of people use it. 

But considering over two billion people across the world have the messaging service, it’s surprisingly unpopular in Denmark.

Research by the Kantar Institute and national broadcaster DR back in 2020 found that only 4 percent of the Danish population use Whatsapp daily.

In comparison, Facebook and Instagram, also owned by Whatsapp’s parent company Meta, are used by 84 percent and 56 percent of adults respectively according to 2023 figures from Statistics Denmark.

The Whatsapp figure may have grown since 2020 but there’s little doubt it’s still way behind the others. The reason? Danes just seem to prefer Messenger.

Where are the curtains?

Another curious absence that might go unnoticed until pointed out is the absence of curtains on the windows of Danish homes.

Unlike in many other countries, where curtains are a common decoration for privacy, Denmark’s residents often forego this conventional window dressing, preferring unrestricted views of their surroundings and prioritising more natural light during the day.

This is perhaps related to a general preference for clean, functional design and simplicity, as well as a need to let in as much light as possible during at least half the year.

When homes do cover their windows, it’s far more likely to be with blinds, either of the Venetian type (persienner) or roller (rullegardiner) or for western-facing windows, blackout blinds (mørklægningsgardiner).

If you’re a fan of lace curtains or drapes, you’ve probably come to the wrong place.

What else is conspicuous by its absence in Denmark? Let us know in the comments below.

Member comments

  1. Decent variety of fish in the supermarket is something we really miss. I regularly return to my old stamping ground on the Franco-Swiss border, hundreds of km from the sea, and the fresh fish in the local Carrefour is invariably excellent. Why can’t they manage it in Odense, 20 minutes from the coast?

  2. And you could add Bath tubs, how many Danish homes only have showers. And double Duvets, all Danes prefer single ones, and finally spontaneously, you invite a Danish friend for a get together and they will say yes in three months time because they have a full calendar…. What happened to “great let’s say tomorrow”

  3. Could you consider an article on Monile Pay. It is tge single most difficulty for those of us staying a longer time than a quick visit. I am here for eight months on a grandparenting trip.
    I am so often disappointed to be out walking in the countryside and come across lovely items for sale, especially fresh or homemade produce. Festivals will take cash but awkward and expensive to take small amounts from ATM’s.
    It seems I must have a Danish phone number and bank account. This is a great pity!

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DANISH HABITS

How to survive a children’s birthday party in Denmark

If you've moved to Denmark as a family, or had children after moving here, you might find that kids' birthday parties are your first big opportunity to make Danish friends. Here's how to deal with the occasion like a Dane.

Published: 29 August 2024 15:17 CEST
How to survive a children's birthday party in Denmark

If you’re hosting, remember: man skal bare hygge sig (you only need to have a nice time!)

In a some countries, children’s parties (børnefødselsdage) are an opportunity for social competition. You blast other parents away with a conjuror flown in from Dubai, helium on tap, cakes and treats from the most expensive local caterer, glitzy decor, and generous presents for each attendant. 

Not in Denmark. Here it should be hyggeligt: good enough to meet the minimum requirements for a children’s party, but not so lavish as to create a standard other parents might struggle to meet. In short, just make sure everyone feels comfortable and that there’s a pleasant vibe.

You can add small personal touches – cute homemade cup cakes, a party game from your own country – but nothing too dramatic. 

Whatever you do though, don’t forget the Danish flags. The national flag, Dannebrog, is not only a symbol of patriotic pride but a marker of any celebratory occasion, not least birthdays. You’ll see little paper flags stuck into the grass outside, tiny ones scattered across the dining table and, if there’s a flagpole on the property, an outsized version of the red Danish flag proudly flying to show there’s a birthday going on.

A flagpole is not a must, but making sure there are flags is. Fortunately, this is easy to do if you’re hosting a birthday, because all supermarkets sell packets of paper flags of all sizes, for the specific purpose of using them for birthday parties.

READ ALSO: Why do Danes use their national flag as a birthday banner?

Who to invite? 

There aren’t any strict rules about this, but until the age of nine or so, don’t be surprised if you are expected to invite all the kids in your child’s børnehave (kindergarten) or class, even the weird ones with unsavoury parents. 

If they all come, and you invite friends too, this can mean something like 15-20 children, and perhaps a similar number of adults, running around your house or apartment.

While a good way to cut down on numbers might be to send out the invitations a week, or even just two or three days, in advance — Danes aren’t big on spontaneity — you might find that even with plenty of notice, the number who have prior plans will mean you end up with a manageable amount.

Although Denmark is a highly digitised society, birthday party invitations can still be sent out like they were in the 1990s and 2000s — on a piece of paper deposited at each of your child’s’ classmates’ coat hooks, drawers, or whatever other space they have for storage at their school or kindergarten.

Where to have it? 

If your house or apartment is big enough to handle 20-30 people, then you can host it at home. In which case, to meet Danish standards, you should make sure everything is impeccably tidy. In terms of decor, aside from the mandatory flags (see above), balloons and maybe a bit of bunting are enough. 

If you live in a 50 square-metre, two-bed apartment, and want to avoid a squeeze, many blocks of apartments in Denmark have a shared function room called a fællessal. These can be a little institutional and you should book it well in advance (usually through the building’s vicevært or the housing association, if this is applicable). On the plus side, you won’t have to tidy your house before the event.

Skattejagt or fiskedam? 

Danish children’s parties – up until the children are aged about nine anyway – usually have one of these two things.

A skattejagt is a treasure hunt (skat = treasure, jagt = hunt), where a series of paper clues leads to a box or bag containing bags of sweeties. A fiskedam is a fishing game (fisk = fish, dam = pond) in which bags of sweeties are fished out. 

Whichever it is, the game is often announced by the birthday boy or girl halfway through the party and is a way of delivering a sweetie bag into the hands of each child while also sending a signal to parents that it will soon be time to get going.

READ ALSO: Five Danish children’s songs international parents will inevitably have to learn

These games are quite important in successfully creating a hyggelig kid’s birthday vibe. If you don’t have them, children will complain.

For the skattejagt, the clues can be simply a drawing of the place where the next clue is hidden, but for older kids they can be more challenging and creative: I’ve heard of clues frozen in a block of ice in the freezer, hung out of the window on string, and put inside balloons which need to be popped. 

For the fiskedam, a curtain or sheet is pinned about 150 centimetres high across a doorway. A fishing rod is then created from a broom handle or other suitable pole, with a piece of string tied to the end, and a clothes peg at the other end of the string. Children (with the help of an adult) then fish for the sweetie bags, and an adult on the other side either attaches the sweets, or some sort of comedy item (a sock, a boot, or an unused nappy, for instance).

The bag should contain maybe ten sweets, of which one is a lollipop as well as maybe a small toy like a temporary tattoo or bouncy ball.

What should you lay on? 

A giant thermos of coffee for parents is pretty much obligatory. There should be also be tea, but you don’t need to go overboard here. A box of green tea bags and another one with some kind of fruit infusion will do. If you’re attending a birthday (or anything else in Denmark for that matter), then Yorkshire Tea or PG Tips are not going to be on the menu.

Some biscuits or småkager for the grown ups to nibble on also goes down well, as does some sliced fruit like melon, pear and apple. If it’s summer, include a bowl of strawberries (don’t worry about the cream).

You should lay on a couple of different types of crisp or nuts, and children should also get saft, a berry squash drink. 

If you want to offer warm food — this is not a bad idea if the party is likely to last a few hours — then pølsehorn, small hotdogs which can either be baked with your own dough or bought frozen, are enough to keep everyone happy (with a bit of ketchup on the side).

It’s a good idea to offer sausage, biscuit and cake options in vegetarian, gluten-free, and lactose-free form.

What about the cake?

In the UK and the US, it is totally acceptable and even encouraged to make your own cake representing a child’s favourite cartoon character, an animal or a vehicle.

This is less common in Denmark, where a lagkage, literally “layer cake” consisting of layers of sponge, cream, strawberries and chocolate is the quintessential birthday cake at kids’ parties.

If you want to push the boat out a bit while remaining fully traditional you could buy or make a lagkage with an extra marzipan layer. 

Putting candles on the cake and getting the fødselar or birthday boy or girl to blow them out is not uncommon but I’ve also seen children’s birthdays where this hasn’t featured, leading me to think it’s probably an imported custom in Denmark.

What to do as a guest? 

Danes are punctual, so unless you’ve warned otherwise, turn up within 15 minutes of the party’s official start time, and pick up your children about 15 minutes before the official end (if you’re not staying — for younger children, a parent will probably stay for the duration).

READ ALSO: Six ways to make a great impression at a Danish home

Children can be dressed up in fancy dress, or in better-than-average clothes, but shouldn’t be in mini-tuxedos or frilly crinoline. Normal clothes are also fine, but they should be clean. 

Up until about the age of five or maybe six, at least one parent is expected to stay while the party is going on. After that, most will just take off their children’s boots and jacket, oversee the giving of presents, and disappear. 

If you do have the chance to stay, it’s probably best to do so, as it’s one of the best opportunities you will find to get to know other parents as a foreigner in Denmark. 

If you do, you should probably help out the hosts with clearing the table, stacking the dishwasher, and calming crying children.

You should bring a present for your child to hand over but it’s best not to spend much more than 100 kroner. Cards are less important but older children might want to a write longer message to their friend, in which case you should not hold back. Toy guns, swords, knives and nunchucks are generally frowned upon. 

Do you have any tips for Danish birthdays? Let us know in the comments.

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