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DENMARK EXPLAINED

Manhood, butter, and piracy: How foreigners have managed to offend Danes

Danes are known for their ironic sense of humour and love of teasing. But can they take it as well as give it out? We asked readers if they've ever succeded in properly offending a Dane. Here are the answers so far.

Manhood, butter, and piracy: How foreigners have managed to offend Danes
Lurpak butter from Arla. Danes can be proud about the strangest things. Photo: Bo Amstrup/Ritzau Scanpix

Danes often pride themselves on having an edgy sense of humour that can get very close to the bone, boasting that no topic, however non-PC is out of bounds. But is that actually true? Are there arguments you can make, insults you can give, and jokes you can crack that go beyond the mark? 

Several of the respondents to our survey have discovered that there definitely are, with some unexpected subjects managing to raise the hackles of their Danish friends, collegues and relatives. 

If you’ve also managed to offend someone in Denmark, either unintentionally or perhaps intentionally too, please answer the survey, which is pasted below and we’ll add it to this article. 

Casting aspersions on Danes’ chivalric manhood

Zdravka, from Bulgaria, says she has in the past offended Danish men by accusing them of lacking the manly virtues of chivalry and generosity celebrated in her home country. 

“I told him that according to my culture and upbringing he’s not considered a man because where I come from, men take pride in providing for their women and don’t expect them to split bills 50:50,” she wrote in our survey. 

She said that in her opinion the offensive power of her accusation boiled down to cultural differences. 

“It is a factor, since my culture is conflicting with the Danish mindset of equality, bordering on lack of chivalry and gentlemanly traits.” 

Failing to appreciate the superiority of Danish butter 

Ann, a scientist from Brazil, made the mistake of saying she preferred the taste of Italian butter when accompanying her Danish extended family on a holiday to Italy. 

“The next day for breakfast, my Danish family put Lurpack on the table and we never saw the Italian one again. After checking with my husband, or my boyfriend at the time, he said that yes, I had offended the whole family without realising it.” 

Danes she said had managed to offend her “all the time”. 

“About skin colour and what happens or not in Brazil: they have no filter for how they ask things, and are honest and direct. I have learned to like it.” 

Even so, she said, she had been surprised. “I couldn’t know what the sensitive topics were and how proud they can be of something as simple as butter.” 

Laughing at people with names from Norse mythology

Gary, a Frenchman living in Copenhagen, took a wrong step when he laughed at someone he met at a party who introduced themselves as “Thor”.

“In my first months in Denmark, I attended a party with my girlfriend. I started chatting with a guy and he introduced himself as ‘Thor’. I started laughing and asked him to tell me the truth. He turned red and never talked to me again. That’s how I learned that ‘Thor’ was a very common name in Denmark.” 

Breaking minor national laws

Lam from Canada came a cropper when he invited some Danish friends to a video night for which he had secured a bunch of pirated DVDs. 

“They didn’t say they were offended, but they just cut all communications,” he remembers, saying he had been confused by the reaction.

“I’m from Canada, and it could be an issue with some people, but definitely not to the point that they would cut communications.” 

Discussing Danes’ alleged lack of spontaneity 

Alice (not her real name), a Pole living in Roskilde, said she had once offended a co-worker by drawing attention to Danes’ alleged lack of spontaneity. 

“This wasn’t a big deal, but one time when out with some coworkers I said that Danes are not spontaneous, because they plan all social outings weeks in advance. One person didn’t take it well and seemed peeved that he could be perceived that way,” she said. “The situation was quickly forgotten though, as soon as the next round of beers arrived.”

Taking offensive jokes further than Danes would do 

Danes claim to like their humour edgy, but some other cultures like to get even closer to the mark when joking with close friends. 

“In Ireland, the more close your friends are, the more apparently ‘rude’ to them you are,” explained Greg, an Irishman living in Roskilde. He said that in the early stages of his marriage, this was something his Danish wife had struggled with. 

“My Danish wife took a while to understand why her loving, polite Irish husband was rude to his Irish friends…..and vice versa. But once she got it she joined in with gusto!”

Disrespecting the Danish royals 

Maria from Greece didn’t spend much time in Denmark before realising that making off-colour jokes about the then Queen Margrethe II did not go down at all well. 

“I cannot understand how they so much respect a family who lives from their taxes and supports such an outdated system,” she told us in exasperation. “Kings and queens are a no-no for Greeks, unless you are a fascist.” 

Have you ever offended a Dane, unintentionally or intentionally, please mention it in the comments or fill in our form below and we’ll add your anecdote to the article. 

 

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DENMARK EXPLAINED

‘Foreningsliv’: How to start a club for your sport or hobby in Denmark

Denmark has around 100,000 voluntary clubs and associations and many Danes are involved in at least one of them. How can you start your own?

'Foreningsliv': How to start a club for your sport or hobby in Denmark

What is foreningsliv in Denmark? 

Foreningsliv – association or club life – is a central part of Denmark’s social fabric. Rather than socialising in bars, cafés or on the streets, a big chunk of Danish social life has historically taken place around things like handball clubs, knitting circles, dancing groups and the like. 

Figures from earlier this year show that some 2.4 million people in Denmark are members of sports associations alone, with many involved in the running of those associations on a voluntary basis.

Danes are proud of the rather formal way clubs and associations are organised. Most have a board led by a chair, normally with a deputy chair, secretary, treasurer, and other board members. Even the most informal organisations – such as social societies for students at universities – will take minutes at meetings, prepare agendas and appoint a chair and a treasurer.

This level of organisation seems to be a “school for democracy”, the fundamental building block of an effective system for reaching consensus that reaches all the way to the national parliament. 

So for foreigners, getting involved in foreningsliv is a quick and effective way to get more integrated, helping them not only to meet Danes but also to understand how they think and what makes the country tick. 

READ ALSO: ‘Be patient’: How to make Danish friends as a newcomer to Denmark

What do you need to start a forening in Denmark? 

There’s nothing to stop you just getting together with some people with similar interests and just starting a club or association without registering it anywhere at all.

Freedom of association is one of Denmark’s fundamental constitutional rights and that freedom includes the right to run your club however you see fit, without needing any permission to register it.

Any association considered to be based on the leisure interests, beliefs or hobbies of its members fall into this category and do not need to be registered with the Danish Business Authority (Erhvervs- og Selskabsstyrelsen). These can include sports, political and religious associations.

There are some situations where an association might be encompassed by business tax rules – for example, housing cooperatives. In these cases, the association does need to be registered.

You also do not need to have membership rules, a styrelse (board), or any officers. But Danes generally prefer to have this structure in place, whether or not they decide to register the club formally. 

If you want your club or association to outlast you, want to have a shared bank account, or want to be able to apply for and receive grants, it can be worth registering as a voluntary organisation or frivillig forening. This means the organisation can get a business registration (CVR) number and a bank account (NemKonto).

READ ALSO: EXPLAINED: The steps for starting a business in Denmark

How do you start a forening

To establish a new club formally takes three clear steps: 

  1. You need to meet (or communicate online) to decide what sort of club or association you want to start, what the name will be, and sketch out what you will do.
  2. You need to draw up a list of vedtægter or club statutes. These should include a description of the association’s name, its aims and goals, and how decisions will be made.
  3. You need to hold a meeting where the association is formally established and its board chosen, as well as a budget set and activities planned. This meeting is normally declared the stiftende generalforsamling or establishing general meeting, and will also include approval of the club statutes. The Centre for Voluntary Social Work (CFSA) has a useful ‘starter pack’ for new associations.

What needs to happen in the meeting establishing an association? 

Protocols are taken very seriously in Danish foreningsliv, so the establishing meeting will typically be announced in advance on social media or with a leaflet posted somewhere where those likely to be interested might see it.

The meeting should be open to people unknown to the founding members, and the issues to be discussed should be laid out in an agenda sent out in advance. 

The meeting will normally follow a standard agenda, which will run something like this: 

  • Register of all those present
  • Selection of chair (dirigent) for the meeting 
  • Selection of secretary (referent) for the meeting 
  • Determination of the agenda for the meeting
  • Discussion of the background for the proposed establishment of the association
  • Vote on whether the association should be established 
  • Discussion and vote on whether the statutes (vedtægter) put forward should be accepted, including details on when annual general meetings take place 
  • Proposals and vote on budget and future activities
  • Decision on a board, with a chair, treasurer and at least two board members
  • Decision on date for next meeting 

The following points can also be included:

  • Discussion and vote on the name of the association
  • Decision on whether there should be a membership fee (and if so, how much) 

Both the chair and the secretary of the meeting will usually be required to sign the minutes – which act as the association’s ‘birth certificate’ or record of its founding principles and existence.

How to register a forening 

If you want your club or association to have a bank account, be able to hire premises, apply for grants or work with companies or the municipality, you need to register it with the Danish Business Authority (Erhvervs- og Selskabsstyrelsen).

All of these things require a CVR number – an equivalent of the CPR personal registration number, but for business and organisations – and a standard bank account, a NemKonto.

The portal for registering an association with the Danish Business Authority can be found here.

What next? 

It can be helpful for sports clubs to be part of an umbrella organisation for their sport, which is perhaps best done through this form on the website of Denmark’s two such organisations, DIF and DGI. Guidelines and application portals can be found here.

Sports associations can apply for funding through the DIF and DGI sports association funds, which grant around 50 million kroner per year, so looking into this is a must if you want to secure successful funding for your sports club.

You can also apply for grants from local municipalities or other authorities to help run your club or association, with applications in Copenhagen made on this page here, in Aarhus here, and in Odense here

Good luck! 

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